Featured

“Apno Ka Zeher” / “Poison from My Own”:

“Ghairon se bachne ki hamesha tayyari thi humein,
Par apno ke waar ne be-asra kar diya…”

“I was always prepared for strangers,
But betrayal from my own blood destroyed me…”

– Zulfikar Inamdar

“Apno Ka Zeher”:

Arz kiya hai ke:

Ye jo dushman mere jaan ke hai,
In me saare mere khandaan aur mere pehchaan ke hai…
Jo kabhi mere saath baith kar hasa karte the,
Aaj wahi meri barbaadi ke armaan ke hai…

Maine toh har rishta dil se nibhaya tha,
Har apne ko Rab ki rehmat samjha tha…
Kisko khabar thi iss safar-e-zindagi me,
Sabse bada dard apno ne dena tha…

Kuch chehre roshni jaise lagte rahe,
Magar andar se andheron ki dukaan nikle…
Jinhe apni duaon me maanga tha maine,
Wahi meri badduaon ka samaan nikle…

Ye jo dushman mere jaan ke hai,
In me saare mere pehchaan ke hai…
Kisi ne hasad me zeher ghola,
Kisi ne mohabbat ka naam lekar toda…

Kisi ne kandhe par haath rakha,
Aur peeche se meri kamar tod di…
Kisi ne “apna” keh kar gale lagaya,
Phir meri hi rooh ko tanha chhod di…

Bohot ajeeb hota hai woh lamha bhi,
Jab insaan sachchai samajhne lagta hai…
Har muskurata chehra wafadaar nahi hota,
Ye dil dheere dheere samajhne lagta hai…

Mai chup raha toh kamzor samjha gaya,
Mai toot gaya toh mazaak banaya gaya…
Jin logon ke liye khud ko mita diya maine,
Unhi ke haathon baar baar rulaya gaya…

Ab toh har rishta dara deta hai mujhe,
Har mohabbat me fareb nazar aata hai…
Log chehre pe chehra laga kar milte hai,
Kaun apna hai samajh nahi aata hai…

Maine apni zindagi ki kitaab khol kar rakhi,
Logon ne har safhe ko hawa bana diya…
Mere jazbaat mere raaz mere ehsaas,
Sabko mehfil ka qissa bana diya…

Aaj tanha hoon toh gham nahi mujhe,
Kam se kam dhoke ka darr toh nahi…
Akele chalne ki aadat si ho gayi hai,
Ab kisi ke badalne ka darr toh nahi…

Ye jo dushman mere jaan ke hai,
In me saare mere khandaan aur mere pehchaan ke hai…
Aur sabse bada sitam toh ye hai ke,
Chehre sab apne hai… par dil anjaan ke hai…

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English Version:

“Poison from My Own”:

A request is:

Those who now stand against my soul,
Are all people I once called my own…
The same ones who laughed beside me,
Now wait silently to see me broken and alone…

I carried every relationship with sincerity,
Believing every loved one was a blessing from God…
Little did I know that in this journey of life,
The deepest wounds would come from my own blood…

Some faces looked brighter than light,
Yet carried darkness hidden deep inside…
The people I once prayed for with love,
Became the reason my soul slowly died…

Someone placed a hand on my shoulder,
While quietly stabbing my back in silence…
Someone hugged me calling me “family,”
Then abandoned my heart to loneliness and violence…

Now every relationship frightens me,
Every smile feels covered in disguise…
People wear masks upon their faces,
And truth disappears behind their lies…

Today I walk alone without complaint,
At least betrayal no longer follows me there…
Because the cruelest pain in this world is when,
Your enemies are the people for whom you once cared… 🌹

Featured

Rooh Ki Awaaz:

“Kabhi kabhi kisi ki yaad itni gehri ho jaati hai,
ke rooh awaaz deti rehti hai…
par samne wala kabhi sun hi nahi pata.”

– Zulfikar Inamdar

🌙 “Rooh Ki Aawaaz”

Usey kya khabar ke mai khwaab hu,
Wo jo ghum hai mere sapno ki haqiqat me…
Mai chup sa rehta hu, lekin meri khamoshi ke neeche
Uska naam roz hilta rehta hai mere dard ki satah par.

Raat jab bhi bechaini ka haath pakadti hai,
Koi rooh ke andar se awaaz deti hai—
“Tu ab bhi usi ka hai… chaahe duniya ko kabhi na pata chale.”
Aur mai ruk jaata hu, jaise waqt ne kadmon ko pakad liya ho.

Meri palkein bojhal, meri saansein halki,
Par mere andar ek gehri si pukaar—
Jo har raat ke andhere me
Mujhe us tak le jaane ki zid karti rehti hai.

Kai baar lagta hai, Zulfi,
Main jeeta hi uski awaazon ka bojh uthakar hu—
Wo awaaz jo kabhi uski thi,
Aur ab sirf meri rooh ka daag ban kar reh gayi hai.

Kisi se kya kahu?
Woh toh be-khabar hi raha mere girte sambhalte jazbaat se,
Usko kya maloom mera har intezaar
Kaise meri rooh ki seedhiyon se utarta chadhta raha…

Kayi khwaab toot gaye…
Par uski yaad ki ek kiran ab bhi
Raaton ke sannate me chamakti hai—
Jaise koi bikhra hua sitara mujhe pukaar raha ho.

Mai kabhi usse azaad nahi hua,
Aur na hi kabhi poori tarah bandha raha…
Bas ek ajeeb si lakeer hai hum dono ke darmiyan,
Jo na mit-ti hai,
Na poori tarah dikh paati hai.

Kabhi lagta hai ke uski yaad hi meri zindagi ka asal ghar hai—
Jahan mai laut kar rota hu,
Muskurata hu,
Aur fir chup ho jaata hu…
Jaise saal bhar ki thakawat ek hi naam me sama gayi ho.

Usey kya khabar ke mai khwaab hu…
Wo toh kabka bas gaya hai meri saanson, meri riwayaton,
Meri tanha dard bhari raaton me—
Ek aisi aawaaz ki tarah
Jo na poori tarah jinda hoti hai,
Na kabhi marne deti hai mujhe.

“Tasveer Ke Paar” / “Beyond The Photograph”:

“Mohabbat jab adhuri reh jaaye,
toh insaan baaton se nahi… tasveeron se jeene lagta hai…”

“When love remains unfinished,
people stop living through conversations… and start surviving through photographs…”

– Zulfikar Inamdar

“Tasveer Ke Paar”:

Arz kiya hai…

Tujhse milne ko tarasta hoon, par mulaqat nahi kar sakta,
Mere paas sirf uski tasveer hai… dekh sakta hoon, par baat nahi kar sakta…

Kabhi kabhi lagta hai jaise woh tasveer mujhe dekh rahi ho,
Meri tanhaayi par chupke se aansu baha rahi ho…

Main uski aankhon me apna pura jahaan dhoond leta hoon,
Magar woh jahaan mera hokar bhi mera nahi ho sakta…

Uski ek muskurahat ne kabhi mujhe zinda rakha tha,
Aaj wahi muskurahat mujhe andar se tod deti hai…

Maine kitni dafa tasveer se poocha hai,
“Batana… kya usne kabhi mujhe yaad bhi kiya?”
Magar har dafa sirf khamoshi mili,
Jaise dard ko bhi alfaaz naseeb na ho…

Ye kaisi mohabbat hai ke,
Main uske bina jee bhi raha hoon aur mar bhi raha hoon…
Saans chal rahi hai magar rooh kahin ruk si gayi hai…

Kabhi kabhi uski tasveer ko itni der tak dekhta hoon,
Ke apni hi aankhon me uska aks utar aata hai…
Aur phir khud se darr lagta hai mujhe,
Ke kahin main yaadon ka qabristaan na ban jaun…

Meri raaton ka sukoon bhi usi ke naam ho gaya,
Aur meri neendon ka qatl bhi usi ne kiya…

Ajeeb baat hai na…
Insaan zinda kisi ke saath rehta hai,
Magar andar se kisi aur ki yaadon me dafan hota rehta hai…

Main chaah kar bhi usse bhula nahi sakta,
Kyuki bhoolne ke liye nafrat chahiye…
Aur meri mohabbat me aaj bhi sirf duaayein basti hain…

Uski tasveer purani ho gayi hai,
Magar meri chahat aaj bhi nayi lagti hai…
Waqt badal gaya, log badal gaye,
Par mera intezaar aaj bhi wahi khada hai…

Kabhi kabhi dil karta hai tasveer jala doon,
Taake ye dard bhi raakh ho jaaye…
Magar phir darr lagta hai,
Kahin uski aakhri nishaani bhi mujhse juda na ho jaaye…

Aur sach toh ye hai…
Main usse paakar bhi shayad itna khush na hota,
Jitna usse kho kar udaas ho chuka hoon…

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English Version:

“Beyond The Photograph”:

I long to meet you every day,
Yet fate keeps you so far away…
All I have is your photograph near,
I can see your face… but you cannot hear…

I hold your picture close each night,
And search your eyes in the pale moonlight…
Your silent smile still feels so true,
Yet silence is all I get from you…

Sometimes I whisper your name so slow,
As if your heart somewhere may know…
But empty walls just hear my pain,
And send my echoes back again…

Your memory lives inside my chest,
Like a wound that never rests…
I smile outside for all to see,
While storms keep breaking inside me…

Sometimes I stare till tears appear,
Pretending somehow you are near…
The world may move, the days may fly,
But your absence never passes by…

Love became my quiet cage,
A story trapped on every page…
I breathe somehow, I live somehow,
But I am not the same soul now…

Your picture may grow old with time,
Yet my love stays in every line…
People changed and seasons flew,
But my heart still waits for you…

And honestly, the deepest scar,
Is loving someone from afar…
To have their face but not their touch,
To miss one soul this painfully much…

Sometimes I think I should let go,
Burn every memory I still know…
But then I fear when ashes part,
You may disappear from my heart…

So here I stand with endless pain,
Calling your name again, again…
With just your photograph in sight,
To love you silently every night… ❤️

“Some loves never fade away,
they simply learn to survive in silence…”

“Nazar-e-Mohabbat” / “The Eyes That Cannot Bear”:

“Mohabbat ki sabse khamosh takleef ye hoti hai…
Ke insan kisi ko kho kar nahi, balki kisi aur ki nazron mein dekh kar tootne lagta hai…”

“The deepest pain of love is not losing someone…
It is watching the world admire the soul you silently call your own.”

– Zulfikar Inamdar

“Nazar-e-Mohabbat”:

Arz kiya hai…

Hum toh tumhe dekhte hain ibaadat ki tarah,
Magar tumhe dekhne wale humse dekhe nahi jaate…

Teri aankhon mein jo ek noor sa utarta hai,
Us noor pe kisi aur ke saaye humse dekhe nahi jaate…

Humne toh dil ko samjha liya tha tere bina jeene par,
Magar tere aas-paas ghoomte chehre humse dekhe nahi jaate…

Kaisi ajeeb si bechain mohabbat hai meri,
Ke tere naam ke saath kisi aur ke lafz humse likhe nahi jaate…

Tujhe paane ki zid kab ki chhod di humne,
Magar tujhe khone ke tasavvur humse soche nahi jaate…

Teri ek muskurahat pe duniya luta dein hum,
Magar woh muskurahat sab mein baanti jaaye humse dekhe nahi jaate…

Yun toh har mehfil mein muskura kar baithe rehte hain,
Par tere zikr ke baad chehre humse sambhaale nahi jaate…

Tum saamne ho toh lagta hai waqt theher gaya,
Tum door ho toh lamhe bhi humse guzaare nahi jaate…

Humne har dard ko chup reh kar seh liya lekin,
Tere liye uthti hui nazrein humse sahe nahi jaate…

Na jaane tum mein aisi kya baat hai jaan-e-wafa,
Ke tumhare baad kisi aur ke khayaal dil mein laaye nahi jaate…

Kabhi socha na tha mohabbat itni gehri hogi,
Ke raat bhar jaag kar bhi ashk humse bahaaye nahi jaate…

Teri khushbu tak se mehsoos hoti hai teri maujoodgi,
Aur phir log kehte hain ke ehsaas dekhe nahi jaate…

Humne toh bas tujhe apna samajh kar chaaha tha,
Magar mohabbat ke daave humse jataye nahi jaate…

Kuch is tarah basa hai tera gham meri rooh mein,
Ke ab khushi ke mausam bhi humse manaye nahi jaate…

Teri awaaz sun kar dil ko sukoon milta hai,
Aur phir kai din tak humse khud ko sambhaale nahi jaate…

Ek arsa hua khud se bhi baat kiye hue,
Ab toh tanhaayi ke lamhe bhi humse kaate nahi jaate…

Hum toh tere sheher mein khud ko kho chuke kab ke,
Magar tere raaston se ab bhi hum door jaaye nahi jaate…

Log poochte hain kya mila tujhe iss mohabbat se,
Aur humse dil ke zakhm kisi ko dikhaye nahi jaate…

Tumhe dekh kar sajde mein jhuk jaata hai dil,
Magar ye raaz zamaane ko humse bataye nahi jaate…

Kabhi mehsoos karo toh samajh aayegi meri khamoshi,
Kuch dard lafzon mein kabhi samjhaye nahi jaate…

Aur aakhir mein bas itna hi sach hai…

Hum toh tumhe dekhte hain ibaadat ki tarah,
Magar tumhe dekhne wale humse dekhe nahi jaate…

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English Version:

“The Eyes That Cannot Bear”:

A request is….

I look at you as though you were my prayer,
But the eyes that wander toward you… I cannot bear…

There’s a sacred kind of light within your gaze,
And seeing strangers touched by it feels unfair…

I taught my heart the art of silent longing,
Yet these restless feelings refuse repair…

I never begged destiny to make you mine,
But losing you is a fear my soul can’t wear…

Your smile could make a dying world breathe again,
Yet seeing it shared with others is despair…

I sit in crowded rooms pretending I am whole,
While your name alone leaves my spirit bare…

When you are near, even time kneels down in silence,
When you are gone, every moment becomes hard to bear…

I endured every wound life placed upon my chest,
But jealous eyes upon you are scars beyond compare…

There is something about you I cannot explain,
For after knowing you, no one else feels rare…

I never knew love could become this deep,
Where tears remain trapped because the heart is too aware…

Your presence lingers like perfume in forgotten air,
And suddenly every empty corner feels you there…

I loved you quietly without demanding forever,
Yet my soul still breaks when others stop and stare…

Some nights your memory burns like midnight rain,
Soft… beautiful… and painfully unfair…

Your voice brings peace to storms inside my chest,
Then leaves behind a silence too heavy to bear…

I lost myself somewhere within your existence,
And now even solitude asks why I still care…

People ask what I gained from loving you this way,
How do I explain a wound that looks like prayer…?

Perhaps love was never meant to be possession,
Perhaps some hearts are only destined to despair…

And in the end, all I know is this—

I look at you as though you were my prayer,
But the eyes that wander toward you… I cannot bear…

“Sirf Mujhe Chhod Kar…” / “Except Me…”:

“Sabse zyada takleef tab hoti hai,
jab jis shakhs se hum baat karna chahte hain…
usay humse baat karne ki zarurat hi mehsoos nahi hoti…” 💔

“The deepest pain is when the only person you want to talk to…
is perfectly fine talking to everyone except you.” 💔

– Zulfikar Inamdar

“Sirf Mujhe Chhod Kar…”:

Arz kiya hai…

Mujhe kisi se baat karne ki chahat nahi,
sirf ek insaan ko chhod kar…
Aur usay har kisi se guftagu ka shauq hai,
sirf mujhe chhod kar…

Main uski ek awaaz pe poora din jee leta hoon,
woh mere ek paighaam ko nazarandaaz kar deta hai…
Main uski khamoshi ko bhi mohabbat samajhta raha,
aur woh meri mohabbat ko bas waqt ka guzarna kehta hai…

Main har raat uski yaadon ke saath sota hoon,
jaise koi zakhmi parinda andheron mein sisakta ho…
Woh naye chehron mein muskurata rehta hai,
aur mera dil tanhaayi mein roz bikhar ta ho…

Maine duniya bhar ki mehfilein chhod di uske liye,
har awaaz se rishta tod diya…
Bas ek uski baat sunne ki khatir,
maine apne andar ka shor tod diya…

Magar usay kabhi meri kami mehsoos hi nahi hui,
jaise main uski zindagi ka hissa hi nahi tha…
Main uske har dard mein rota raha,
aur woh meri aankhon ka aansu bhi nahi tha…

Kabhi kabhi dil cheekh kar poochta hai mujhse —
kya mohabbat sirf tadapne ka naam hai?
Kya ek shakhs ke liye poori duniya chhod dena,
akhir mein sirf barbaad hone ka kaam hai?

Main uski online aane ki aahat tak pehchan leta hoon,
uske typing karne se dil dhadakne lagta hai…
Aur woh itna beparwah hai meri chahat se,
ke mera naam dekh kar bhi chup reh jata hai…

Kitni ajeeb baat hai na…
Jis shakhs ko hum apni duaon mein maangte hain,
aksar wahi shakhs humein
apni duaon mein shamil karna bhool jata hai…

Main uske liye har rishte se door ho gaya,
har mehfil mein khud ko tanha kar diya…
Aur usne meri wafaa ka sila yun diya,
ke mujhe apni hi nazron mein ruswa kar diya…

Ab toh aadat si ho gayi hai dard ke saath jeene ki,
har khushi bhi adhoori lagti hai…
Jis dil mein sirf ek naam basa ho,
usay poori duniya bhi kam lagti hai…

Kabhi sochta hoon sab kuch chhod doon,
uski yaadon ko dil se mita doon…
Phir dil ke kisi kone se awaaz aati hai —
“Jisay itni shiddat se chaha ho, usay kaise bhula doon…”

Meri aankhon mein jo nami rehti hai,
woh kisi baarish ka paani nahi…
Ye us mohabbat ka maatam hai,
jiski kahani ka koi anjaam nahi…

Woh shayad kabhi samajh bhi na sake,
ke kisi ko nazarandaaz karna kitna dard deta hai…
Jab ek shakhs sirf tumse baat karna chahe,
aur tumhara dil kisi aur mehfil mein rehta hai…

Maine uski khushi mein apni jaan tak rakh di hoti,
agar usne kabhi sachche dil se pukara hota…
Magar usay toh aadat thi bas muskurakar guzar jaane ki,
kaash usne ek baar mujhe dobara sambhala hota…

Ab main andar se bilkul khokhla ho chuka hoon,
jaise kisi purani imarat ka girta hua dar hoon…
Log kehte hain muskura liya karo,
unhe kya pata main kitne dard ka ghar hoon…

Aur ab akhir mein bas itna samajh aaya hai mujhe —
Mohabbat har kisi ko naseeb nahi hoti…
Kuch log dil mein umr bhar rehte hain,
magar haathon ki lakeeron mein kabhi nahi hote… 💔

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English Version

“Except Me…”:

A request is:

I do not wish to talk to anyone anymore,
except that one person…
And they seem to find comfort in talking to everyone,
except me…

I survive an entire day just hearing their voice once,
while they ignore even my smallest message…
I kept mistaking their silence for love,
while they treated my love like passing time…

Every night I sleep beside their memories,
like a wounded bird trembling in the dark…
They keep smiling among new faces,
while my lonely heart keeps falling apart…

I walked away from crowded gatherings for them,
I silenced every noise around my soul…
Just to hear one conversation from them,
I buried storms inside me whole…

But they never truly noticed my absence,
as if I never belonged in their life…
I cried for every pain they carried,
while my tears never touched their eyes…

Sometimes my heart screams at me asking —
Is love only another name for suffering?
Is leaving the whole world for one person
meant only for breaking and crumbling?

I recognize even the sound of them coming online,
their typing alone makes my heartbeat race…
Yet they are so careless toward my feelings,
they see my name… and still leave no trace…

How strange love truly is…
The person we pray for every night,
often forgets to keep us
in even one of their prayers…

I distanced myself from everyone for them,
turned every gathering into loneliness…
And this was the reward for my loyalty —
I lost myself in my own helplessness…

Now pain feels like an old companion,
even happiness feels incomplete somehow…
When one name lives inside your heart,
the entire world still feels too small…

Sometimes I think of letting go completely,
erasing their memories from my chest…
But a voice deep inside whispers softly —
“How do you forget the one you loved the most?”

The tears living inside my eyes
are not rainwater from the skies…
They are mourning for a love story
that was never meant to survive…

Perhaps they will never understand
how painful ignorance can truly be…
When someone only wishes to speak to you,
while your heart belongs elsewhere completely…

I would have given my life for their happiness,
if only they had called me sincerely once…
But they were used to smiling and walking away,
never realizing how badly I needed them…

Now I feel hollow from within,
like an abandoned house falling apart…
People tell me to smile more often,
they do not know how ruined is my heart…

And in the end, I understood only this —
Not every love story is destined to stay…
Some people live inside your soul forever,
but never inside your fate… 💔

“Khushbu se Qatl” / “Killed by Fragrance”:

“Zehar se bachna aasaan tha… mushkil to khushbu se bachna nikla.”

“Poison was easy to survive… it was the fragrance that broke me.”

– Zulfikar Inamdar

“Khushbu Se Qatl”:

Arz kiya hai ke…

Maine bohot se aastin ke saapon ko sahaa hai,
Har zehar ko muskurakar pee jaana meri aadat raha hai…

Jinhone dushmani khuli aankhon se nibhayi, unse kabhi shikwa na hua,
Jo apne ban kar mile, unse har baar dil toda gaya hai…

Main har zakham ko chup chaap sajata raha seene mein,
Log samajhte rahe ke main be-dard ho gaya hoon…

Raat ki tanhaiyon mein cheekhta raha khud se,
Subah har dafa naya chehra pehen leta raha hoon…

Mujhe giraane ki koshish mein duniya lagi rahi,
Aur main har dafa khud ko sambhalta raha hoon…

Na kisi ki nafrat ne mujhe itna toda,
Na kisi ke zehar ne mujhe itna jalaya…

Magar ek narm si muskurahat, ek halka sa ehsaas,
Mujhe andar hi andar se mita gaya…

Woh jise apna samjha, wohi meri kamzori ban gaya,
Jise sukoon samjha tha, wohi meri bechaini ka sabab ban gaya…

Na teer laga, na talwar chali, na jung ka shor hua,
Phir bhi meri rooh ka qatl khamoshi se ho gaya…

Ek gulaab ki khushbu ne halaak kar diya mujhe,
Warna main to har zehar se bach kar nikal aaya tha…

Ab na kisi dushman ka darr hai, na kisi dhokhe ka gham,
Ab to bas apni yaadon ka bojh uthata hoon main…

Jo mehfil kabhi meri awaaz se roshan hoti thi,
Aaj usi mehfil mein khud se hi chup jaata hoon main…

Kuch rishton ki haqeeqat itni der se samajh aati hai,
Jab tak samajh aata hai… insaan toot chuka hota hai…

Ek khushbu ka qatl ajeeb hota hai,
Na khoon girta hai, na nishaan bachta hai…

Bas ek insaan dheere dheere khud se door hota hai,
Aur duniya ke beech reh kar bhi tanha ho jaata hai…

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English Version:

“Killed by Fragrance”:

A request is….

I have endured countless hidden snakes,
Smiling, I made peace with every poison…

Open enemies never hurt me this deep,
It was those who came as my own who broke me…

I kept decorating my wounds in silence,
While the world believed I had become numb…

In lonely nights, I screamed within myself,
Yet every morning, I wore a new face…

The world kept trying to bring me down,
And I kept learning how to stand again…

No hatred ever shattered me like this,
No poison ever burned me this way…

But a soft smile… a gentle feeling,
Destroyed me from within…

The one I trusted became my weakness,
The peace I sought became my unrest…

No arrow struck, no sword was raised,
Yet my soul was quietly murdered…

The fragrance of a rose killed me,
While I had survived every poison before…

Now I fear neither enemies nor betrayal,
Only the weight of my own memories…

The gathering once lit by my voice,
Now feels like a place I hide from myself…

Some truths in relationships come too late,
And by then… a person is already broken…

A death by fragrance is strange and silent,
No blood, no visible scars…

Just a slow drift away from oneself,
Until you’re alone… even in a crowd…

“Gehra Aaraam” / “Deep Rest”:

“Kabhi kabhi rooh sirf sukoon nahi maangti…
woh toot kar bas thehar jaana chahti hai.”

“Sometimes the soul doesn’t ask for peace…
it just wants to stop, completely, and finally rest.”

– Zulfikar Inamdar

“Gehra Aaraam”:

Arz kiya hai ke…

Mai zindagi ke jaddojahad se thak chuka hoon,
Har ek bojh ko khud par utha chuka hoon…

Har roz ek nayi jung thi mere andar kahin,
Main khud hi se lad kar khud ko hara chuka hoon…

Na raaste ne saath diya, na manzil ne pukara,
Main be-nishaan safar mein khud ko ghuma chuka hoon…

Jo muskurahat thi kabhi chehre ki pehchaan,
Usey dard ke saaye mein chupa chuka hoon…

Ab na koi shor hai, na khwahish ka silsila,
Main apne hi andar sab kuch mita chuka hoon…

Ab sukoon chahta hoon… yaa gehra aaraam ataa kar,
Ae mere Rab… main sab kuch to nibhaa chuka hoon…

Na sochon ka bojh ho, na yaadon ki bheed,
Main har ek ehsaas se khud ko chhuda chuka hoon…

Kab tak sambhalta main iss bikharte hue dil ko,
Main har tukde ko baar baar jod chuka hoon…

Ab bas ek lambi khamoshi ka ehsaan kar de,
Main lafzon ke samundar mein doob chuka hoon…

Yaa Rab… agar rehmat ka koi dariya baaqi ho,
Toh is thaki hui rooh ko apne paas bulaa kar,
Mujhe khud se hi riha kar…
Mujhe gehra aaraam ataa kar…

___________________________________

English Version:

“Deep Rest”:

A request is…

I am tired of life’s endless struggle now,
I’ve carried every burden I knew how…

Each day was a silent war within my chest,
Fighting myself, I’ve lost more than the rest…

No road stayed loyal, no destination called,
In this nameless journey, I’ve endlessly stalled…

The smile that once defined my face and name,
I’ve hidden it deep beneath shadows of pain…

No noise remains, no desires left to claim,
Inside myself, I’ve erased even my name…

Now I seek peace… or grant me a deeper rest,
O my Lord… I have endured, I’ve done my best…

No weight of thoughts, no crowd of memories near,
I’ve let go of feelings I once held dear…

How long could I hold this breaking heart tight?
I’ve mended its pieces, again and again, every night…

Now bless me with silence, vast and profound,
I’ve drowned in words where no shore can be found…

O Lord… if mercy still flows somewhere above,
Then pull this tired soul closer with love…
Free me from myself… set my spirit apart…
And grant me, at last…
a deep, eternal rest… in my heart.

“Khud Se Rukhsat” / “Farewell to Myself”:

“Kabhi kabhi insaan duniya se nahi…
Bas khud se hi alvida keh deta hai.”

“Sometimes, the hardest goodbye is not to the world…
but to the person you once were.”

– Zulfikar Inamdar

“Khud Se Rukhsat”:

Arz kiya hai ke…

Rukhsat toh dulhano ko kiya jata hai kehte hain log,
Magar aaj khud se juda hone ka waqt aa gaya…
Na doli, na shehnai, na koi rasam ka shor,
Bas dil ke ek kone mein sannata sa chaa gaya…

Main khud hi apna mehmaan tha iss jism ke ghar mein,
Aaj mehfil bhi meri hai aur main hi uth kar chala gaya…
Kisiko khabar bhi na hui mere tootne ki aahaton ki,
Main chupke se apne hi saaye se door jaa gaya…

Kabhi jo hans kar jeeta tha khwabon ki roshni mein,
Aaj wahi khwab andheron ka libaas pehen gaya…
Jo baatein dil mein thi kabhi, alfaaz ban na saki,
Wahi khamosh dard aaj meri zubaan ban gaya…

Na koi sawal poocha, na kisi ne rokne ki koshish ki,
Jaise mera hona hi kisi afsane sa reh gaya…
Main khud ko dhoondta raha iss bheed bhari duniya mein,
Aur aakhir khud hi apne aap se kho gaya…

Ye rukhsat bhi ajeeb hai, na aansu na koi gale milna,
Bas ek thandi si saans aur sab kuch peeche reh gaya…
Falak bhi hairaan hoga meri iss khamosh rawangi par,
Ek insaan aaya tha… aur khud se hi guzar gaya…

__________________________________

English Version:

“Farewell to Myself”

A request is…

They say farewells are meant for brides,
Yet today, I part ways with myself…
No procession, no music, no sacred rites,
Just a silence settling deep within…

I was a guest in the house of my own being,
Tonight, the host and the leaving soul are one…
No one heard the echoes of my breaking,
I quietly slipped away from my own shadow…

Once, I lived smiling in the light of dreams,
Now those dreams are draped in darkness…
Words that once trembled inside my heart,
Have turned into a voiceless pain that speaks…

No questions asked, no hands reached out,
As if my existence was just a passing tale…
I kept searching for myself in crowded worlds,
Only to lose myself within my own maze…

This farewell is strange—no tears, no embraces,
Just a cold breath… and everything left behind…
Even the sky must wonder at this silent departure,
A man arrived… and quietly passed through himself…

“Khud Se Jang” / “War Within Myself”:

“Main apni hi sochon ka qaid ho gaya hoon,
Har din khud se ladte ladte thak gaya hoon…
Magar dil ke kisi chup kone mein,
Ab bhi ek awaaz aati hai —
‘Tu toot gaya hai… lekin khatam nahi hua.’”

“I became a prisoner of my own thoughts,
Fighting myself every single day until I was exhausted…
Yet somewhere deep within my silence,
a voice still whispers —
‘You are broken… but you are not finished.’”

– Zulfikar Inamdar

“Khud Se Jang”:

Arz kiya hai ke…

Mujhe nafrat ho gayi hai khud se,
Khud ko bekaar kar liya maine…
Zehni sochon se ladte ladte,
Khud ko bimaar kar liya maine…

Main apni hi sochon ke daldal mein,
Roz thoda thoda utarta gaya…
Har ek khayal ne dheere dheere,
Mujhe andar se hi marta gaya…

Har subah bojh si lagti hai,
Har raat qarzdaar si hoti hai…
Main jeena chahta hoon lekin,
Zindagi inkaar si hoti hai…

Aaina dekhu to lagta hai,
Ye chehra mera nahi raha…
Jo kabhi roshan tha andar se,
Wo insaan kahin kho gaya…

Na shikwa kisi se baqi hai,
Na kisi se koi gila raha…
Bas apne hi khamosh dard ka,
Main khud hi silsila raha…

Log kehte hain sab theek hoga,
Par dil ko tasalli hoti nahi…
Har ek umeed ke tukde ko,
Main jodta hoon, wo jodti nahi…

Kabhi sajdon mein sukoon milta tha,
Ab dua bhi bojh si lagti hai…
Phir bhi toot kar har raat main,
Rab ko pukarta rehta hoon chup si…

Kisi ne samjha nahi dard mera,
Kisi ne mehsoos kiya nahi…
Is bheed bhari duniya ke andar,
Maine khud ko jiya nahi…

Main khud se bhaagna chahta tha,
Magar kahan tak bhaag pata…
Har raasta ghoom ke phir se,
Mujhe mere paas hi le aata…

Main ne sab ko maaf kar diya,
Bas khud ko maaf kar na saka…
Sab zakhmon ko bharne diya,
Par apna zakham bhar na saka…

Kabhi lagta hai main kho gaya hoon,
Kabhi lagta hai main hoon hi nahi…
Jaise saans to chal rahi hai,
Par zindagi kahin bhi nahi…

Magar kahin dil ke kone mein,
Ek halki si roshni baqi hai…
Jo kehti hai “abhi khatam nahi”,
Bas itni si zindagi baqi hai…

Gir kar bhi uthne ki aadat hai,
Yeh dard bhi kya kamaal karta hai…
Khud se haar kar bhi ai Zulfikar,
Dil jeene ka sawaal karta hai…

___________________________________

English Version:

“War Within Myself”:

A Request is…

I have grown to resent myself,
I turned my own worth into nothingness…
Fighting the chaos inside my mind,
I slowly made myself a sickness…

Into the swamp of my own thoughts,
I kept sinking a little each day…
Every single thought, piece by piece,
Was quietly taking my life away…

Every morning feels like a burden,
Every night feels painfully owed…
I want to live, I truly do…
But life keeps telling me “no”…

When I look into the mirror now,
This face no longer feels like mine…
The man who once lived within me,
Has been lost somewhere in time…

No complaints against anyone remain,
No grudges left to confess…
Just an endless chain of silent pain,
That I carry in loneliness…

People say “everything will be fine,”
But my heart finds no relief…
Every broken piece of hope I try to fix,
Falls apart in silent grief…

Once I found peace in prostration,
Now even prayers feel heavy and cold…
Yet every night, shattered and weak,
I still call upon my Lord…

No one ever understood my pain,
No one truly saw inside…
In a world so full of people,
I forgot how it feels to be alive…

I tried to run away from myself,
But how far could I really go…
Every road I chose eventually,
Brought me back to the same shadow…

I forgave everyone in my life,
But myself—I couldn’t release…
I let every wound slowly heal,
Except mine… which never found peace…

Sometimes I feel like I’m lost,
Sometimes I feel I don’t exist…
As if I’m breathing without a soul,
As if life itself has been dismissed…

And yet… somewhere deep inside,
A faint little light still remains…
It whispers softly, “not the end,”
Through all the darkness and pain…

I have learned to rise after every fall,
Even pain has its own strange art…
Even after losing to myself,
My heart still chooses to restart…

“Aakhri Thakan” / “The Final Exhaustion”:

“Kabhi kabhi zindagi itni khamosh ho jaati hai…
ke insaan bolna nahi chhodta,
bas kisi ke sunne ki umeed chhod deta hai.” ❤️

“Sometimes the deepest pain is not loud… it is the silence of a heart that has given up asking for anything.”❤️

– Zulfikar Inamdar

“Aakhri Thakan”:

Arz kiya hai ke….

Mai thak gaya hu…
sach kahu to ab andar se bilkul thak gaya hu…
na jism me taqat baaqi hai,
na rooh me woh pehli si roshni…

Roz ek naya din uthta hai,
magar mere andar raat hi rehti hai…
log kehte hain “sab theek ho jayega”,
magar mere dil ko ab koi tasalli nahi rehti hai…

Apne haathon se roti banata hu,
aur khud hi chup chaap kha leta hu…
na koi “aur lo” kehne wala,
na koi “thoda aur baitho” kehne wala…

Ghar hai… deewarein hain…
magar usme “ghar” jaisa kuch nahi…
awaazein hain, saansen hain,
magar zindagi jaisa kuch nahi…

Dost hain, rishtedaar hain sab,
magar rishton mein woh baat nahi…
sab apni apni duniya mein masroof hain,
aur meri duniya mein ab koi saath nahi…

Maine duniya ke liye kitna kuch chhoda,
kitni khushiyan dafan kar di…
magar aaj jab khud ko dekhta hu,
to lagta hai maine apni hi zindagi kho di…

Raat ko jab neend nahi aati,
to sochta hu — galti kahan hui?
Kya itna bura tha mai,
ya meri kismat hi mujhse rooth gayi…

Kabhi kabhi dil karta hai zor se ro lu,
itna ke saansein bhi toot jayein…
magar aansu bhi ab saath nahi dete,
jaise woh bhi mujhse rooth gaye hain…

Ya Allah… bas ab aur nahi hota,
yeh bojh ab uthaya nahi jaata…
agar yeh imtihaan hai, to reham kar,
ab aur sabr kiya nahi jaata…

Mujhe wapas woh sukoon de de,
jo kabhi mere dil mein rehta tha…
ya phir itni himmat de de,
ke main is tanhaai ko apna leta…

Mai thak gaya hu…
sach kahu to ab bas thak gaya hu…
agar zindagi yahi hai,
to ya Allah… mujhe apne paas bula le tu…

__________________________________

English Version:

“The Final Exhaustion”:

A request is:

I am tired…
not just physically, but deep within my soul…
there’s no strength left in my body,
no light left in my spirit…

Each day rises like a new beginning,
but inside me, it’s always night…
people say “everything will be okay,”
but my heart no longer believes their light…

I cook with my own hands,
and eat in silence, all alone…
no one to say “have some more,”
no one to say “stay a little longer at home…”

There are walls… there is a house…
but nothing feels like a home…
there is breath, there is life…
but inside, I endlessly roam…

I had people… I had relations…
but something got lost along the way…
everyone is busy in their own world,
and in mine… no one chose to stay…

I sacrificed so much for this world,
buried my own happiness deep…
and now when I look at myself,
it feels like I’ve lost everything I was meant to keep…

At night, when sleep escapes me,
I ask — where did I go wrong?
Was I truly that unworthy…
or was I never meant to belong…

Sometimes I wish to cry out loud,
until my breath starts to break…
but even my tears have abandoned me,
as if they too couldn’t stay…

Oh Allah… I can’t carry this anymore,
this weight is too heavy to bear…
if this is a test, then have mercy…
because patience is no longer there…

Give me back the peace I once had,
or give me strength to accept this pain…
because I am tired… so deeply tired… of living this life in vain…

“Maa ke Baad Reh Gaya Sirf Khamoshi ka Ghar” / “After Mother, Only Silence Remains”:

Maa chali jaaye toh zindagi chalti rehti hai… par dil kabhi aage nahi badhta.

After a mother is gone… life continues, but the heart never finds its way home again.

-Zulfikar Inamdar

Maa ke Baad Reh Gaya Sirf Khamoshi ka Ghar:

Arz kiya hai ke…

Maa ke bina ghar mein rakhi hui koi cheez nahi milti…
Jaise har cheez ne apna raasta uske saath hi chhod diya ho…
Almari kholun toh kapde mil jaate hain,
Par unmein se woh khushboo nahi milti… jo maa ke haath se aati thi…

Kabhi jo bina pooche sab kuch mil jaata tha,
Aaj har chhoti si cheez ke liye ghar chhaan maar deta hoon…
Magar na cheez milti hai… na sukoon…
Sirf thakan milti hai… aur aankhon mein nami reh jaati hai…

Woh awaaz…
Jo har dafa kehti thi —
“Yahan rakha hai beta, dekh zara…”
Aaj woh awaaz sirf yaadon mein aati hai…
Aur main us awaaz ko pakadne ki koshish karta hoon…
Jaise koi toot ta sitara haath mein samet raha ho…

Ghar ka har kona aaj bhi waise hi hai…
Deewarein bhi wahi hain… darwaaze bhi wahi hain…
Magar phir bhi lagta hai ke sab kuch badal gaya hai…
Jaise ghar ne apni rooh kho di ho…

Rasoi mein jaata hoon toh bartan chup hain…
Chulha thanda hai…
Aur main sochta hoon…
Woh haath kahan gaye jo roti ke saath dua bhi sekte the…
Ab khaana sirf zinda rakhta hai…
Jeene ka ehsaas nahi deta…

Kabhi thak kar ghar aata tha…
Toh maa ke ek “aa gaya beta?” mein
Saari thakan utar jaati thi…
Aaj poora din beet jaata hai…
Koi poochne wala nahi hota…
Aur thakan sirf jism mein nahi… rooh mein bas jaati hai…

Aur hum…
Hum kitne nadan the na…
Sochte the sukoon paison mein hai…
Safalta mein hai… duniya ki taareef mein hai…
Magar ab samajh aaya…
Sukoon toh us waqt tha jab maa ke paas baith jaate the…
Bina kuch kahe… bina kuch maange…
Sirf uski maujoodgi hi kaafi hoti thi…

Aaj jab dard had se badh jaata hai…
Toh bas ek hi naam zubaan par aata hai — “Maa…”
Magar jawab mein sirf khamoshi milti hai…
Aur woh khamoshi itni tez hoti hai…
Ke dil ke andar tak cheer deti hai…

Raat ke andhere mein jab sab so jaate hain…
Main aksar uth kar baith jaata hoon…
Aur sochta hoon…
Kya sach mein woh chali gayi…?
Ya bas kisi kone mein chup kar mujhe dekh rahi hai…

Phir yaad aata hai…
Qabr ki mitti thandi hoti hai…
Aur us mitti ke neeche meri poori duniya so rahi hai…

Maa chali jaaye toh samajh aata hai…
Ke zindagi kitni tanha ho sakti hai…
Logon ke beech reh kar bhi insaan kitna akela ho sakta hai…

Ab ghar aata hoon toh darwaza khud hi kholta hoon…
Aur andar aake mehsoos hota hai…
Jaise main kisi aur ke ghar mein aa gaya hoon…
Apna hi ghar… ajnabi lagne lagta hai…

Aur sabse zyada dard tab hota hai…
Jab khushi ka koi pal aata hai…
Aur dil kehta hai — “Maa ko batata hoon…”
Phir yaad aata hai…
Batane ke liye ab koi maa nahi hai…

Bas yahi sach hai…
Maa ke jaane ke baad…
Insaan jeeta toh hai…
Magar poora kabhi nahi rehta…

___________________________________

English Version:

After Mother, Only Silence Remains:

A request is:….

Nothing in the house can be found anymore…
As if every object forgot its place the day she left.

The cupboard still holds the same clothes,
But her warmth… her scent… is gone forever.

Once, I never had to search for anything,
She was my answer before I even had a question.
Now I walk from room to room,
Holding emptiness in my hands… and heaviness in my chest.

Her voice…
That gentle, loving call —
“It’s right here, son…”
Now echoes only inside my memories,
And every echo breaks something inside me… quietly.

The house is still standing…
The walls haven’t moved, the doors are the same,
But the soul of this place has disappeared.

I step into the kitchen sometimes…
Everything is there — utensils, stove, food…
But the hands that mixed love into every meal… are gone.
Now food fills my stomach…
But leaves my soul starving.

There was a time…
When one simple question from her —
“Have you eaten?”
Could heal an entire day of pain.

Now days pass…
No one asks, no one notices…
And the tiredness doesn’t stay in the body anymore…
It sinks deep into the soul.

And we…
We are such foolish people…
Searching for peace in money, in people, in the noise of the world…
Not realizing…
Peace once lived quietly in her prayers…
In her presence… in her dua.

Sometimes the pain becomes unbearable…
And without thinking, my lips whisper — “Maa…”
But the silence that answers back…
Feels louder than any scream I’ve ever heard.

At night, when the world falls asleep…
I sit alone and wonder…
Is she really gone?
Or is she somewhere close… watching me break…

Then reality hits like a storm…
The cold soil of her grave holds my entire world now…

When a mother leaves…
It’s not just a person who goes away…
It’s an entire universe that collapses silently.

Now I return home…
Open the door myself…
And step into a place that once was mine…
But now feels like a stranger’s house.

And the deepest pain…
Is when something good happens…
And your first instinct is — “I should tell my mother…”
But then it hits you…
There is no one left to tell.

This is the truth…
After a mother is gone…
You don’t stop living…
But you never truly feel alive again.